“For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” Matthew 16:26 NKJV
As I mentioned in my last blog post, I am facilitating a small group titled, “Understanding Soul Care.” The course curriculum was developed by Dr. Dharius Daniels, founder of Change Church in New Jersey. Dr. Daniels encourages us to work through our soul wounds and create solutions to heal them. We have become quite good at self-care, but what about soul care? We make regular appointments with our hair stylist, manicurist, esthetician, etc. to keep our outer appearance in tip top shape, but how are we caring for our inner being—our soul?
In July 2017, Oprah interviewed William Paul Young on Super Soul Sunday, a daytime series on Oprah’s OWN network where prominent thought leaders provide insight on various topics. Young is the author of the New York Times best-selling novel, “The Shack.” It is an incredible story of Mackensie Phillips, known as “Mack,” who is questioning his faith after his 6-year old daughter, Missy, is kidnapped and murdered on a family vacation. After 3 years, of grief and depression, Mack receives a letter from God requesting a meeting at “The Shack”—the place of Missy’s murder.
During this Super Soul Sunday interview, Young reveals that “The Shack” represents the house on the inside of us where we hide our soul wounds—pain, addictions, insecurities, depression, promiscuity, brokenness, and secrets. “The Shack” represented Young’s own pain and brokenness from sexual abuse and pornography addiction. He also admitted to having an affair and making several bad business investments. In 2004, due to these bad investments, he suffered a major financial loss where he lost everything. He had hit rock bottom—ironically, this is when he began to trust God. In 2005, while on a commuter train to one of his three jobs, Young writes a story titled, “The Shack” for his six children as Christmas gifts because he could not afford to purchase any. What was meant as a simple Christmas gift for his children was transformed into a New York Times Bestseller ministering and healing others across the world. Had Young not experienced this brokenness, “The Shack” would have never been written. Oprah commented, “The beauty of this is that our challenges, our struggles, our holes is what eventually (if we are willing to do the work) makes us whole.”
In his curriculum, Dr. Daniels offers the following strategy when assessing soul wounds:
- Identify the offense. What happened?
- Expose the feelings. How is your soul today?
- Examine the feelings. Is this something you should be upset about? Should you be upset to the degree that you are upset? If overreacting, what does that say about your soul?
- Identify the perceived loss. Identify what you are hoping to get out of the situation.
- Identify the actual loss. Consider what the situation was instead of what you hope it would be.
- Expose the lies. Stop yourself from making all or none statements. “I’m never…” or “That’s why you shouldn’t…” Delete the lies.
- Apply the truth. What is the truth about the situation/hurt? How can it be reframed using God’s word?
As a result of childhood hurts, I secretly built my own shack. In my shack, I housed soul wounds of trust and rejection issues, alienation, unforgiveness and defensiveness. Over the years, I have gradually demolished the shack that lives within; however, I must admit there are still a few scraps of that old shack lying around. It is a daily struggle to destroy the vices that continue to threaten my inner peace; however, by practicing self-care and soul care, I strive daily to be beautiful inside and out.
If you are interested in a free 30-min coaching session, book an appointment at calendly.com/new-wine-consulting.